Captain's Blog

Ahoy, Critterfolk!
New entry Jun 21

Critter Notices

[It's Freebie Friday in the Critters Store...]

ReAnimus Acquires Advent!

ReAnimus Press is pleased to announce the acquisition of the legendary Advent Publishers! Advent is now a subsidiary of ReAnimus Press, and we will continue to publish Advent's titles under the Advent name. Advent was founded in 1956 by Earl Kemp and others, and has published the likes of James Blish, Hal Clement, Robert Heinlein, Damon Knight, E.E. "Doc" Smith, and many others. Advent's high quality titles have won and been finalists for several Hugo Awards, such as The Encyclopedia of Science Fiction and Fantasy and Heinlein's Children. Watch this space for ebook and print editions of all of Advent's current titles!

Free Web Sites

Free web sites for authors (and others) are available at www.nyx.net.

New Book from a Critter Member

**NOW IN PRINT EDITION TOO!** Awesome new book, HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR SPECULATIVE FICTION OPENINGS, from a Critter member whose unearthed a shard of The Secret to becoming a pro writer. Really good piece of work. "...if you're at all concerned about story openings, you'd be nuts not to read what Qualkinbush has to say." —Wil McCarthy, author of BLOOM and THE COLLAPSIUM

Stayin' Alive

If you want to make a career of SF writing, STAYING ALIVE - A WRITER'S GUIDE by three-time SFWA President Norman Spinrad, published by your Critter Captain's ReAnimus Press, is an indispensable guide to the inside workings of the SF publishing industry by an expert.

Network speeding up

I'm switching the connection over to a new, shiny 10X faster network because of all the load. There might be bits of downtime as your boxes learn new addresses and things. Should be brief. Let me know of any prolonged outages you see.

Preditors & Editors Changeover

With the very sad passing of Dave Kuzminski, who ran P&E, I've taken over the P&E duties. Lots of what I hope are improvements; check it out at pred-ed.com.

Critters Server is Dying has been Replaced

See important details here in my blog. Let me know if you find anything that isn't working right. (Manuscripts are now available for this week, FYI.)

Book Recommendation

THE SIGIL TRILOGY: The universe is dying from within... "Great stuff... Really enjoyed it." — SFWA Grandmaster Michael Moorcock

Announcing ReAnimus Press

If you need help making ebooks from manuscripts or print copies—or finding great stuff to read—look no further! An ebook publisher started by your very own Critter Captain. (And with a 12% Affiliate program.) [More]

~~~

MORE NEWS & NOTICES >>

CRITTERS STORE >>

 

FEATURED BOOK

~~~

CRITTERS STORE >>

Curing Bad Customer Service —
Just a Dollar a Minute

The Pandemic

Related

Although lightly reported on, you've probably been exposed to the BCS virus, which has reached pandemic proportions beyond even the swine flu. While rarely fatal, BCS can be unpleasant and lead to side effects such as increased blood pressure, weight gain, poor immunities, and heart disease. Left unchecked, BCS among workers can have serious impacts on business profitability and the economy.

That is to say... Bad Customer Service.

We've all experienced it — the surly clerk who won't offer a refund without a long argument; the checker who hides, talking with a friend rather than opening a new checkout lane despite the crowd; the airline that inexplicably cancels your flight or loses your luggage and doesn't seem to care what trouble it causes you. Check out "7 Stories That Prove The Airlines Hate You" for some sad tales. Everyone has stories how they had their time wasted by insensitive employees, bad management, nonsense rules, and mean-spirited policies.

The Cause

It all comes down to time. Let's face it, Time is the measurement unit of your life. You've only got so many minutes on planet Earth. When a company wastes them, they quite literally waste your life without your permission. Sometimes you give willing permission — you tacitly agree to stand in line for a burger for the typical length of time it takes a burger joint to serve the customers you can see ahead of you in line. You tacitly agree to sit at the airport gate some reasonable number of minutes ahead of boarding time. But if you didn't have to you wouldn't want to wait an hour in a TSA security line or sit on a runway for three hours, would you? Loads of fun! Really, these weren't part of the original understanding. You've got better things to do with your time.

Yet organizations have learned that people will accept these kinds of attacks on their time — their life — and they factor it into their business practices and profit models. They even make money by choosing to deliberately inconvenience you and waste your time. Airlines routinely overbook flights, knowing a certain number of passengers will simply be denied a seat through no fault of their own. They know they can blame "the weather" or "the computer" for their own intentionally inadequate planning and resources. Or if not intentional, these are largely avoidable if they chose to value your time.

The Cure

Here's a simple solution: Pay people $1 per minute of time wasted.

"Wasted" means beyond the reasonable time consumers expect, and not because of the fault of the consumer. This could be a law (unlikely, but wouldn't it be great?), a social convention (if enough people demand it), or simply a guideline you use when seeking compensation from a bout with BCS.

Why $1/minute? We need some measure of what the average person's time is worth. A simple formula is to look at what people contribute to the economy: The US GDP is approximately $14 trillion, which when divided into the roughly 200 million workers in the country, who spend around 2000 hours per year working, gives a "value" to people's time of 58 cents per minute. Round up to $1 because we're talking punitive here. We're trying to change bad behavior.

This works regardless why your time was wasted, and it scales to fit the size of the offense. Now you probably wouldn't demand a buck from Walmart because you had to wait an extra 60 seconds while the clerk chatted with a pal instead of serving you, but if Walmart knew you might do so, and that they were on the hook for it, businesses would have the economic incentive to teach Good Customer Service and have managers properly oversee it. If you have to sit on hold an hour to complain about an error in your phone bill, doesn't that sound worth $60 to you off your bill? Your three hour flight delay would net you $180, and maybe that is worth asking for. The poor passengers in that story above who had to fly back to Mexico from Oregon because they couldn't handle immigration — if they were delayed 24 hours, doesn't $1400 cash sound like a start on compensation for that level of stupidity?

More importantly, the airline would have the nudge to make sure there's some workable plan in place to get you to your destination on time. Right now they're stealing your $60 and your $180 and your $1400 from you, intentionally, because they know that although people will grumble, they won't fight hard to get fair compensation. So: Fight for it.

The next time you hear, "Hello, thank you for calling customer service, we're too busy to help you and we know you can't do anything if we put you on hold for an hour", think: Ka-ching! And ask for a buck a minute. (Sometimes it actually works! And don't you think you're worth it?)

Market forces and government regulation sometimes address the more egregious of these acts, though often in a minimalistic manner, and not in the small scale that eats up your time as if it doesn't matter to you. There has to be some amount of time that is reasonable for a given situation, so don't go overboard, but we all know when we're getting taken advantage of. Many companies have forgotten that "The Customer is Always Right" is good business. Imagine if there were a law and voila! your valuable time becomes a factor in businesses' policies. Hit them in the pocket book — it's the only language they understand. Suddenly making the customer happy makes economic business sense.

Of course lawmakers probably wouldn't listen at first, but wouldn't a buck a minute be nice? And who knows — as a wise man once said, "You don't get anything unless you ask for it." The more people who ask for compensation for unreasonably wasted time, the stronger the message to companies that it's unacceptable. When enough people ask for it, it becomes a social convention, which is often stronger than a law. Set expectations that wasting your time is not acceptable.

So what the heck, save the time of your life — demand a buck a minute to cure the BCS virus.

— Andrew Burt

Start now -- Spread the word: Bookmark and Share

[ 10 comments | Add a comment ]

DONATIONS

$
[via ►PayPal or: Amazon]
Happy minion   Happy minion — last donation was 4 days ago. About $3400 to go. A big Thank You! to Peter Elliott, Terrance Crow, Rati Mehrotra, and lots of other Critterfolk for their contributions!

Critters is entirely funded by donations from Critterfolk like you, so yours is most appreciated. Click here to make the minions happy. Every dollar helps. Thanks for your support!

COOL BOOK

WHERE TO?

Manuscripts / Submissions
       (Forgot yer login/password?)
Submit
Member Woohoo!s
Member Bios
Discussion Forums
Black Holes response times
Sitemap

(Critters gets a pittance of support via advertising; Critters does not endorse any advertiser nor have control over ad content.)

SHARE THIS PAGE

Bookmark and Share

follow critters on twitterFollow critters on twitter

LOOKING FOR SOMETHING TO READ?

(Or want to collect money for other people reading your stories?) Check out Aburt's ReAnimus Press.

CRITTERS DIPLOMACY

Fundamental to Critters' success is how people deliver criticisms. Start by reading Critiquing the Wild Writer: It's Not What You Say, But How You Say It. and The Diplomatic Critiquer.

NOVELS

Critters has a special program to get whole novels critiqued. Read about it here.

HOW TO SUBMIT

Please follow these guidelines for formatting and submitting manuscripts to Critters.

WHAT'S IN THE QUEUE

Critters keeps a queue of manuscripts out or to be sent. See the Queue.

WEEKLY MPC AWARD

Want to jump to the head of the Critters queue? The Most Productive Critter or MPC is Awarded weekly to encourage mo' better critting. How to win...

FAQ

Critters has an extensive FAQ to answer your every question.

CHECK OUT ABURT'S OTHER PROJECTS

Visit the Critter Captain on Facebook:
Andrew Burt

Create Your Badge